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 Duties & Rights After Marriage
Allah informs us about the just rights of each other on us: "But, in accordance with justice, the wife's rights (with regard to their husbands) are equal to the (husband's) rights with regard to them, although men are a degree above them; and Allah is Almighty, Wise." (Qur'an, Al Baqarah : 228) The statement that men are a degree above women means that authority within the household has been give to the husband in preference to the wife because a heavier burden has been placed on his shoulders by another verse of the Quran which says: "Men shall take full care of women, because Allah has given the one more strength than the other, and because they support them with their means. (Qur'an, An Nisaa : 34)
ADVICES TO HUSBANDS: Jabir narrated that the Prophet, peace be upon him, gave these instructions in his sermon during Farewell Pilgrimage: "Fear God regarding women; for you have taken them [in marriage] with the trust of God." [Mishkat] Narrated Aisha, God's messenger said: "Among the believers who show most perfect faith are those who have the best disposition, and are kindest to their families." [Tirmidhi] Narrated Abu Huraira, God's messenger said: "The believers who show the most perfect faith are those who have the best disposition and the best of you are those who are best to their wives." [Tirmidhi] Aisha has related that the Holy Prophet, peace be upon him, would enter the house with a pleasing disposition and a smile on his lips. [Uswa-i-Hasana] Narrated Al-Aswad: "I asked Aisha, `What did the Prophet, peace be upon him, do at home?' She said, `He used to work for his family and when he heard the call for the prayer, he would go out.'" [Bukhari] Narrated Abu Huraira: "Allah's Apostle, peace be upon him, said, `The woman is like a rib; if you try to straighten her, she will break. So if you want to get benefit from her, do so while she still has some bent.'" [Bukhari] Narrated Abu Huraira: "The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, `Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, should not hurt (trouble) his neighbour. And I advise you to take care of women, for they are created from a rib and the most crooked portion of the rib is its upper part; if you try to straighten it, it will break, and if you leave it, it will remain crooked, so I urge you to take care of women. [Bukhari] Narrated Abdullah bin Amr bin Al-As: "Allah's Apostle, peace be upon him, said, `O Abdullah! Have I not been informed that you fast all the day and stand in prayer all night?' I said, `Yes, O Allah's Apostle!' He said, `Do not do that! Observe the fast sometimes and also leave them at other times; stand up for the prayer at night and also sleep at night. Your body has a right over you and your wife has a right over you too.'" [Bukhari] Narrated Ibn Umar: "The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, `All of you are guardians and are responsible for your wards. The ruler is a guardian and the man is a guardian of his family; the lady is a guardian who is responsible for her husband's house and his offsprings; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your wards." Men should forbear any shortcomings of women in view of the following verse of Quran: "Live with them in kindness; even if you dislike them, perhaps you dislike something in which God has place much good." (Qur'an, An Nisaa : 19)
ADVICES TO WIVES Anas reported God's messenger as saying, "When a woman observes the five times of prayer, fasts during Ramadan, preserves her chastity and obeys her husband, she may enter by any of the gates of paradise she wishes (in other words nothing will prevent her from entering paradise)." [Mishkat] Ummu Salama reported God's messenger as saying, "Any woman who dies when her husband is pleased with her will enter Paradise." [Tirmidhi] Abu Huraira told that when God's messenger was asked which woman was best, he replied, "The one who fills [her husband] with joy when he sees her, obeys him when he directs and does not oppose him by displeasing him regarding her person or property." [Mishkat]
PROVIDING FOR WIFE AND FAMILY Quran teaches us to be reasonable and fair to our wives and families. House women wherever you reside, according to your circumstances, and do not harass them in order to make life difficult for them. (Qur'an, At Talaq : 6) The statement of Allah in the chapter `Woman': "Men are protectors and maintainers of women." (Qur'an, An Nisaa : 34) Bukhari quotes the following verse under the heading: .. the superiority of providing for one's family: (O Mohammed!) They ask you what they ought to spend. Say: That which is beyond your needs. Thus Allah make clear to you His Signs in order that you may give thought (to it) in this worldly life and the Hereafter." (Qur'an, Al Baqarah : 219-22) Narrated Abu Masud Al-Ansari: "The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, `When a Muslim spends something on his family intending to receive Allah's reward, it is regarded as Sadqa (spending in the name of God) for him." We should always remember that Allah is the one who gives us, we are just the mere trustees of the funds. Narrated Abu Huraira: "Allah's Apostle, peace be upon him, said, `Allah said, O the son of Adam! Spend, and I shall spend on you.'" Narrated Abu Huraira: "Allah's Apostle, peace be upon him, said, `The best alms is that which you give when you are rich, and you should support your dependants first.'" [Bukhari] Abu Huraira reported God's messenger, peace be upon him, as saying: "Of the dinar (unit of currency) that you spend as a contribution in God's path, or to set free a slave, or as charity given to a needy, or to support your family, the one yielding the greatest reward is that which you spent on your family. [Muslim] |
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