<>_<>I may be old, but I'm not senile yet, Doc.<>_<>
*The old professor visited his doctor for a routine check-up and everything
seemed fine. *
*The doctor proceeded to ask him about his sex life. *
*"Well, "the professor drawled, "not bad at all, to be honest. The wife
isn't all that interested anymore, so I just cruise around. *
*In the past week, I was able to pick-up and bed at least three girls, none
of whom were over thirty years old!"*
*
"My goodness, and at your age too," the doctor commented. "I hope you at
least took some precautions." *
*"Yep. I may be old, but I'm not senile yet, Doc. I gave 'em all a phony
name and phone number."*
seemed fine. *
*The doctor proceeded to ask him about his sex life. *
*"Well, "the professor drawled, "not bad at all, to be honest. The wife
isn't all that interested anymore, so I just cruise around. *
*In the past week, I was able to pick-up and bed at least three girls, none
of whom were over thirty years old!"*
*
"My goodness, and at your age too," the doctor commented. "I hope you at
least took some precautions." *
*"Yep. I may be old, but I'm not senile yet, Doc. I gave 'em all a phony
name and phone number."*
..................................
I was once a legal secretary to a young legal clerk who passed the
bar exam on his third try. This fledgling attorney worked hard
on his initial pleading, which should have read "Attorney at Law"
at the top of the first page.
After I submitted the finished document for his review and
signature, I was embarrassed when he pointed out a critical
typing error. "Must you rub it in?" he asked.
I had typed: "Attorney at Last."
...........................
bar exam on his third try. This fledgling attorney worked hard
on his initial pleading, which should have read "Attorney at Law"
at the top of the first page.
After I submitted the finished document for his review and
signature, I was embarrassed when he pointed out a critical
typing error. "Must you rub it in?" he asked.
I had typed: "Attorney at Last."
...........................
A man was traveling by bus, minding his own business, when a
gorgeous woman, sitting next to him started to breast feed her baby.
The baby wouldn't take it, so she said, "Come on, eat it all up
or I'll give it to this nice man here"
5 mins later, the baby was still not feeding, so she said, "Come
on, honey. Take it or I'll give it to this nice man here"
A few min later the anxious man blurted out,
"Come on, kid. Makeup your mind! I was supposed to get off four
stops ago:
gorgeous woman, sitting next to him started to breast feed her baby.
The baby wouldn't take it, so she said, "Come on, eat it all up
or I'll give it to this nice man here"
5 mins later, the baby was still not feeding, so she said, "Come
on, honey. Take it or I'll give it to this nice man here"
A few min later the anxious man blurted out,
"Come on, kid. Makeup your mind! I was supposed to get off four
stops ago:
.....................
A clumsy file clerk dropped her birth control pills into the
Xerox machine.
It wouldn't reproduce for a month.
.............
Xerox machine.
It wouldn't reproduce for a month.
.............
Bill slumped against the bar, nursing a drink. A man sitting next
to him asked, "If you could live your life over, would you change
anything?"
"Yes, I wouldn't gamble." Bill said.
"Did you lose a lot of money?" the stranger asked sympathetically.
"No, I made a lot of money," Bill muttered, staring at his drink.
"But, I used it to get married
to him asked, "If you could live your life over, would you change
anything?"
"Yes, I wouldn't gamble." Bill said.
"Did you lose a lot of money?" the stranger asked sympathetically.
"No, I made a lot of money," Bill muttered, staring at his drink.
"But, I used it to get married
.................
GIRLS
GIRLS BITWIXT 16-25:- lIKE A FOOTBALL. 22 MEN ARE AFTER.
GIRLS BITWIXT 26-39:- LIKE A CRICKET BALL. ONE CATCHES ALL OTHER CLAPS
GIRLS BITWIXT :-45-59 LIKE A TT BALL. JUST PUSHING TO OTHER MAN.
GIRLS AFTER THAT AGE:- LIKE A GOLF BALL. FARTHEST THE BETTER.
...........................
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