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 *The Sunday service * 
All golfers should live so long !

Toward the end of the Sunday service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?"

80% held  up their hands.

The Minister then repeated his question. All responded this time, except one man, an avid golfer named Walter Barnes, who attended church only when the weather was bad.
"Mr. Barnes, it's obviously not a good morning for golf. It's good to see you here today. Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?"

"I don't have any," he replied gruffly.

"Mr. Barnes, that is very unusual. How old are you?"

"Ninety-eight," he replied. The congregation stood up and clapped their hands.

"Oh, Mr. Barnes, would you please come down in front & tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years & not have an enemy in the world?"

The old golfer tottered down the aisle, stopped in front of the pulpit, turned around, faced the congregation, and said simply, "I outlived all the sons of bitches."

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 *WOMEN WHO KNOW THEIR PLACE * 




Barbara Walters, of 20/20, did a story on gender roles in Kabul ,Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict.

She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands.

She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind their husbands. Despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem happy to maintain the old custom.

Ms Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, 'Why do you now seem happy with an old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?'

The woman looked Ms Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, "Land mines."

Moral of the story is (no matter what language you speak or where you go):

BEHIND EVERY MAN, THERE'S A SMART WOMAN

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 *The Gander difference * 
      Vs             
 
 
1. NAMES:
If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will 
call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.

If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer
to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.


2. EATING OUT:
When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw ina $20, even though it's only for $32.50. 
None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want the change back. 

When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

3. MONEY:
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale. 

4. BATHROOMS:
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream,
razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott.

The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. 

A man would not be able to identify most of these items.


5. ARGUMENTS:
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. 


6. CATS:
Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.


7. FUTURE: 
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.


8. SUCCESS:
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. 
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

9. MARRIAGE:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does. 

10. DRESSING UP:
A woman will dress up to go 4 shopping, to water the plants, 

empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and read the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. 

11. NATURAL:
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

12. OFFSPRING: 
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about
dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods,
secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house. 

13. FINAL THOUGHT:
Any married man should forget his mistakes.
There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

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Enjoy your stay at Rukhsana Group.

Moderators Rukhsana Group:
Aika Rani,Sitara Ansari, Lilly ,A k h t a r,Mumtaz Ali
Contact us at: llolli_bobby@yahoo.com
Aika_Rani@Yahoo.Com
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Rukhsana-owner@yahoogroups.com 
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